Sitting on the phone with one of my brothers made me realize how much I love being a father. Sometimes you really do not understand things until you hear them from someone else. Ever since I found out that I was going to be a father I have tried to develop myself into the model parent and family man. I will admit I have made mistakes and I am growing from them. I use them as the point of no return. The point where I will always be able to reference to say this is where I realized that I had to kick whatever I was doing up another notch.
As I talked with my brother he mentioned that the things I do now will serve as those points of reference for C.J., but in a good way. The prayers we offer, the books I read, the way I communicate with her, and what foundation I set will be seeds ready to sprout in her life at the appropriate time. My responsibility is to water them, prune them, fertilize them, and weed them when the time comes. Every morning as I dress C.J., I look into her eyes and wonder what she sees when she looks at me. I know what I want her to see, but I wonder what she really sees. That is the question I must ask myself daily. I want C.J. to see the same man Mommy sees, the same man that my students see, the same man that my parents see, the same man that my congregants see, the same man that the world sees.
C.J. has changed my life for the better and I appreciate every millisecond of time we spend together because each moment is further developing me as a man, as a husband, and, most of all, as a father. One of my students once told me that C.J. was lucky to have me as a father. Did she know what that meant to me? I do not think she knew to what extent that affected me. I will say that I am lucky to have such a cool kid like C.J., even though she is only about 9 months old as a daughter. I see greatness in her and will give her my all so she develops into the woman she is to be.
I know I was very sentimental today but sometimes you have to really stop and think about how blessed you are. I thank God daily for my family, my baby (that is Mommy), and my Princess (that is C.J.). He has given me responsibility for them and I must honor that and do my best to protect and nurture the blessing bestowed unto me. His grace and mercy bring me through and I pray to him daily. So keep praying, I know and wholeheartedly believe, that prayer changes things, people, and situations!
