The day that no parent wants to deal with is the day their baby seems to be ill but can not articulate it to you. That was C.J. today. She slept, she was fidgety, she was cranky and then she cried her little self to sleep. I will tell you it is the most helpless I had ever felt in life not being able to quickly decipher what the problem was.
At one pint during the night I held her and she was comfortable enough to fall asleep in my arms. The problem was that it was around bath time and I knew she would have to be awaken. The daddy in me exuded from me quickly and I suggested to Shatema that she let her sleep a little longer. Mommy said that will not happen and she proceeded to give her a bath so she could get her to bed. I wanted to stop her but mother knows best.
I will say this feeling helpless is something I do not want to become familiar with. I mean C.J. was fighting through whatever but daddy wanted to be the one to ease any pain or discomfort she was going through. I will have you know the thing that kept her quiet the most today was football. Which mommy could not believe but daddy just smiled.
Hopefully she will sleep through the night and feel a little more like herself tomorrow. If not daddy will be there to comfort her when she beckons him. As Michael Jackson said, "Just call my name and I'll be there, I'll be there to protect you too C.J." As I leave you as always, remember to pray because prayer changes things.
P.S. feel better C.J.!!!!
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Say You, Say Me
Lionel Richer wrote these words,
"Say you, say me; say it for always
That's the way it should be
Say you, say me; say it together
Naturally"
Today was an example of how I wish everyday could be. We slept late. We ate brunch together as a family. We lounged around all day long, reading, listening to music, watching football and sleeping. The key to it all was that the two of us were together. After a week where I had a meltdown because I felt like I was away from C.J. too much. Not to mention work was beginning to annoy me, I felt like I was losing my edge, and I needed to take a day off to begin a self-evaluation process...this is the way I needed the week to end.
Now some of you may say what a way to ruin C.J.'s Halloween but we do not engage in activity of the sort anyway so she and I were good. I think I held C.J. more today than I have ever done thus far. I wanted to make sure that all she was missing of me this week got soaked in. Now I know that is impossible but I think anyone who has children will understand my sentiment.
So as the day faded away and C.J. fell asleep (she did see some of the Notre Dame game)and the idea of the extra hour of sleep became more and more of a thought, I felt a feeling of ease come upon me. Then the lyrics of Lionel Richie, "Say it together, naturally." This is all I want. C.J. and Daddy naturally together. As I look to the week to come, a week where I have set aside two days for me to really look inside of me and change some things, I realize that the number one priority will be how I can be the best touchable Daddy to C.J.
A better me will make a better C.J.! So as I leave to take full advantage of my extra hour of sleep you all remember to pray because prayer changes things!
C.J., there are times in life when you must step back and take a look at all you are doing. You must be like the gardener in a nursery and prune your plants to make sure they continue to grow healthy and strong. Love you a bunch, Daddy!
"Say you, say me; say it for always
That's the way it should be
Say you, say me; say it together
Naturally"
Today was an example of how I wish everyday could be. We slept late. We ate brunch together as a family. We lounged around all day long, reading, listening to music, watching football and sleeping. The key to it all was that the two of us were together. After a week where I had a meltdown because I felt like I was away from C.J. too much. Not to mention work was beginning to annoy me, I felt like I was losing my edge, and I needed to take a day off to begin a self-evaluation process...this is the way I needed the week to end.
Now some of you may say what a way to ruin C.J.'s Halloween but we do not engage in activity of the sort anyway so she and I were good. I think I held C.J. more today than I have ever done thus far. I wanted to make sure that all she was missing of me this week got soaked in. Now I know that is impossible but I think anyone who has children will understand my sentiment.
So as the day faded away and C.J. fell asleep (she did see some of the Notre Dame game)and the idea of the extra hour of sleep became more and more of a thought, I felt a feeling of ease come upon me. Then the lyrics of Lionel Richie, "Say it together, naturally." This is all I want. C.J. and Daddy naturally together. As I look to the week to come, a week where I have set aside two days for me to really look inside of me and change some things, I realize that the number one priority will be how I can be the best touchable Daddy to C.J.
A better me will make a better C.J.! So as I leave to take full advantage of my extra hour of sleep you all remember to pray because prayer changes things!
C.J., there are times in life when you must step back and take a look at all you are doing. You must be like the gardener in a nursery and prune your plants to make sure they continue to grow healthy and strong. Love you a bunch, Daddy!
Friday, October 30, 2009
Witty Kid
Now why can't everyday be like this? It is 3:30pm and we are all home. That means that C.J. and I have the opportunity to play around a bit. So my little girl has this thing with eating her hands...all babies do at this point in their lives. Well anyway, I decided to mess with her by blocking her from eating her right hand. It worked for a bit, but then C.J. figured the other hand must taste just as good, and decided to give it a try, lol! Then I said, "Well I can take that one too." When I did she went back to the right. She played this game until she became tickled with herself. Of course when she was tickled, I became tickled, and the two of us shared a laugh.
As I sat at the computer and began to look at my emails, I look at C.J. as she sat in awe of all the colors and action going on. So you all know what I did next. I began my search for a baby computer for my little one. That way when Daddy is doing work she can work alongside him. Maybe her keyboarding skills will develop as she types on the keys and responds to the sounds that are made. It is all about exposure. If I let her sit idle, then I will have to depend on someone else to introduce her to different things. So I have decided to at least expose her to many different things and then she will be able to pick and choose which she would like to develop further.
Tonight she will be meeting up with CJ#1. These two have a lot of growing up to do together so we have to get ready to get out of here. I will keep you all up do date as to how she is developing when her Daddy messes with her. Until then, always remember to pray becasue prayer changes things!
As I sat at the computer and began to look at my emails, I look at C.J. as she sat in awe of all the colors and action going on. So you all know what I did next. I began my search for a baby computer for my little one. That way when Daddy is doing work she can work alongside him. Maybe her keyboarding skills will develop as she types on the keys and responds to the sounds that are made. It is all about exposure. If I let her sit idle, then I will have to depend on someone else to introduce her to different things. So I have decided to at least expose her to many different things and then she will be able to pick and choose which she would like to develop further.
Tonight she will be meeting up with CJ#1. These two have a lot of growing up to do together so we have to get ready to get out of here. I will keep you all up do date as to how she is developing when her Daddy messes with her. Until then, always remember to pray becasue prayer changes things!
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Personality
Those who know my wife and I know that we have two very different personalities. To sum it up quickly, my wife is an introvert and me, I am the extrovert. So I would gather that C.J. will be somewhere in the middle.
I like to watch her in the morning as she has developed a routine while she wakes up. It interests me because with every stretch and wink, she is developing who she will be. Looks like morning will not be her thing. The next moment I like to study is when we go to pick her up from the sitter. She looks as if she has had a great time all day, but when she sees Mommy and Daddy, a look of excitement exudes from her huge smile.
Another moment I love to witness is when I have her sitting with me and she is making her sounds and blowing bubbles with her mouth and observing her surroundings. We have two huge pictures in the living room...one being of Mommy and Daddy, and the other of some prominent African American figures. I catch her staring at them both throughout our time together. One day I am going to provide her with information on them all. If she develops some of their personalities, C.J. will be OK. Dubois, MLK and Tubman are just 3 of the figures she stares at.
It is my hope that all of the reading and exposure to music, the daily trips, family trips, the interaction with other babies at the sitter, growing up with close family and being active will all play a part in developing one very diverse personality in C.J. Johnson. If she is anything like her Dad, she will have a great mix.
C.J., it is about 10:58pm. Normally you are asleep but you are wide awake making all sorts of funny noises. Even though I wish you were asleep, you have a big smile on Daddy's face because he has not had the opportunity to see you awake all week. I just pray that you are always as happy as you seem to be right now. You will get mad some days and be upset with Daddy, and the rest of the world, but at the end of the day, just smile because God granted you life one more time. Love you!
OK, folks, I am out for today, until tomorrow, always remember to pray because prayer changes things.
I like to watch her in the morning as she has developed a routine while she wakes up. It interests me because with every stretch and wink, she is developing who she will be. Looks like morning will not be her thing. The next moment I like to study is when we go to pick her up from the sitter. She looks as if she has had a great time all day, but when she sees Mommy and Daddy, a look of excitement exudes from her huge smile.
Another moment I love to witness is when I have her sitting with me and she is making her sounds and blowing bubbles with her mouth and observing her surroundings. We have two huge pictures in the living room...one being of Mommy and Daddy, and the other of some prominent African American figures. I catch her staring at them both throughout our time together. One day I am going to provide her with information on them all. If she develops some of their personalities, C.J. will be OK. Dubois, MLK and Tubman are just 3 of the figures she stares at.
It is my hope that all of the reading and exposure to music, the daily trips, family trips, the interaction with other babies at the sitter, growing up with close family and being active will all play a part in developing one very diverse personality in C.J. Johnson. If she is anything like her Dad, she will have a great mix.
C.J., it is about 10:58pm. Normally you are asleep but you are wide awake making all sorts of funny noises. Even though I wish you were asleep, you have a big smile on Daddy's face because he has not had the opportunity to see you awake all week. I just pray that you are always as happy as you seem to be right now. You will get mad some days and be upset with Daddy, and the rest of the world, but at the end of the day, just smile because God granted you life one more time. Love you!
OK, folks, I am out for today, until tomorrow, always remember to pray because prayer changes things.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Like It Should Be
For the past few weeks C.J. and I have had a transportation relationship. I bring her to the babysitter and I pick her up. The problem is that I never envisioned this to be how my relationship with my child would be. I am the type of guy who wants to be with C.J all day, everyday.
The type of career I have presents different seasons and this happens to be the busiest of all. Just last week, I was away from home from Monday through Thursday night. Since C.J. is in bed and sleep at a certain time the only interaction I get is to look at her as I prepare to get in bed. What a boring life for Daddy, and I know C.J. misses the fun we have. So when I came home today and she was awake, you could imagine my joy as we danced, played and watched Sports Center (You know that is our bonding time).
So I needed to take a day off so I could do some self-reflection With all the things going on in my life, the traveling for work, the long commute to and from the office, C.J., church responsibilities and so much more. I needed to take my own advice and evaluate what is important in my life and to effectively plan courses of action. One day will get me started but I have a few more coming up. Some things will change and some things will be cut out completely. I am determined to get back on point. I had a dry spell but now I am plugged into the charger and the green light will be back sooner than later.
Shatema was speaking to C.J. today and assured her that Daddy does all he does for her, and that is the truth. So I am giving notice...if I am going to put 100% effort into something, it had better benefit C.J. in some way. If not, I'm discontinuing all involvement and it goes to the bottom of the totem pole.
I will be back on top shortly! Until then, always remember to pray because prayer changes things.
C.J. you are the family that I pledge allegiance too! With God first I know you will be taken care of.
The type of career I have presents different seasons and this happens to be the busiest of all. Just last week, I was away from home from Monday through Thursday night. Since C.J. is in bed and sleep at a certain time the only interaction I get is to look at her as I prepare to get in bed. What a boring life for Daddy, and I know C.J. misses the fun we have. So when I came home today and she was awake, you could imagine my joy as we danced, played and watched Sports Center (You know that is our bonding time).
So I needed to take a day off so I could do some self-reflection With all the things going on in my life, the traveling for work, the long commute to and from the office, C.J., church responsibilities and so much more. I needed to take my own advice and evaluate what is important in my life and to effectively plan courses of action. One day will get me started but I have a few more coming up. Some things will change and some things will be cut out completely. I am determined to get back on point. I had a dry spell but now I am plugged into the charger and the green light will be back sooner than later.
Shatema was speaking to C.J. today and assured her that Daddy does all he does for her, and that is the truth. So I am giving notice...if I am going to put 100% effort into something, it had better benefit C.J. in some way. If not, I'm discontinuing all involvement and it goes to the bottom of the totem pole.
I will be back on top shortly! Until then, always remember to pray because prayer changes things.
C.J. you are the family that I pledge allegiance too! With God first I know you will be taken care of.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The Day With Pop
Today I only dropped C.J. off to spend the entire day with her grandfather. He was very excited to be the fill in babysitter. I guess C.J. will tell me how it went when she gets older. Anyway its good to have somebody that is able to step in when they are needed. She is taught to value family by seeing this. As I am quick today so i can get some rest always remember to pray because prayer changes things.
Monday, October 26, 2009
My Joy
On many days daddy will come home from work fatigued and dejected. The energy he exerts to provide services to his students and the high level of energy from withing sometimes will get the best of him. He will get so beat down sometimes that he has to listen to his body as it shut down on him. That was the scene today. Worn out at work, (yes it is only Monday)but I had to muster up enough energy to make it to get my ladies.
Life presents many situations for an individual where they must evaluate and make a decision. The decision can be pivotal to not only themselves but to those who love them and for those whose lives they touch on a daily basis in one way or another. Once C.J. came into my life I have been evaluating all that I do. What is important? Will engaging in this activity be a effective use of time? How will this impact on my family? By doing this I gain what? How is this beneficial in the long-run for C.J.
Since C.J. has entered my life I will admit a lot of the things I do and regularly participate have become not important to me. I would rather spend my time with C.J. instead of sitting in a meeting or traveling back and forth to work. I still enjoy doing but I am at a point where I really want to say I will support all the different efforts but you can move on without me. When I look at the hours away from home it hurts me sometimes because on a given day I could see C.J. when I wake her up and drop her off at the sitter. The rest of the day I am away for one reason or another.
I really am beginning to be a family man and it is my responsibility to be there for C.J. Every time I see her I am internally reminded that I am the example of what a man is to her. So if she constantly sees her daddy's back as he descends down the stairs going someplace else. She will begin to think that it may be OK for men to walk in and out of her life. (I know a bit extreme but we never know how things will affect people) I just want to make sure that she understands the concept of family. that she knows what eating dinner together and talking about your day with mommy AND daddy feels like. I want to put her to bed so she feels secure at night. I want her to be able to call out for her daddy and he be there to respond.
C.J. has become a vein filled with joy that circulates within my body. I eat to be healthy to be around for her. I go to work daily to provide for her. I read scripture with her so she hears the word of God even at this young age because I want her to know Jesus for herself. I even shop for her, now if you know me I do not leave myself out either, lol! Anything I do I do it for C.J. and that is why a smile affixed to my face. She is my JOY! and will remain in that spot forever.
I am going call it a night I have got to continue to re-energize myself for the day ahead. In the meantime you all remember to pray because I am a living witness that prayer changes things.
Life presents many situations for an individual where they must evaluate and make a decision. The decision can be pivotal to not only themselves but to those who love them and for those whose lives they touch on a daily basis in one way or another. Once C.J. came into my life I have been evaluating all that I do. What is important? Will engaging in this activity be a effective use of time? How will this impact on my family? By doing this I gain what? How is this beneficial in the long-run for C.J.
Since C.J. has entered my life I will admit a lot of the things I do and regularly participate have become not important to me. I would rather spend my time with C.J. instead of sitting in a meeting or traveling back and forth to work. I still enjoy doing but I am at a point where I really want to say I will support all the different efforts but you can move on without me. When I look at the hours away from home it hurts me sometimes because on a given day I could see C.J. when I wake her up and drop her off at the sitter. The rest of the day I am away for one reason or another.
I really am beginning to be a family man and it is my responsibility to be there for C.J. Every time I see her I am internally reminded that I am the example of what a man is to her. So if she constantly sees her daddy's back as he descends down the stairs going someplace else. She will begin to think that it may be OK for men to walk in and out of her life. (I know a bit extreme but we never know how things will affect people) I just want to make sure that she understands the concept of family. that she knows what eating dinner together and talking about your day with mommy AND daddy feels like. I want to put her to bed so she feels secure at night. I want her to be able to call out for her daddy and he be there to respond.
C.J. has become a vein filled with joy that circulates within my body. I eat to be healthy to be around for her. I go to work daily to provide for her. I read scripture with her so she hears the word of God even at this young age because I want her to know Jesus for herself. I even shop for her, now if you know me I do not leave myself out either, lol! Anything I do I do it for C.J. and that is why a smile affixed to my face. She is my JOY! and will remain in that spot forever.
I am going call it a night I have got to continue to re-energize myself for the day ahead. In the meantime you all remember to pray because I am a living witness that prayer changes things.
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